Ugh. I thought we were over the sleep regression stage but it seems we are back to no routine and random waking up.
As you may know Ellie doesn’t sleep great. She slept through from about 9 months to 12 months and since then wakes regularly unless she is in our bed. I was always against bed sharing/co sleeping but when it is the only option for a good nights sleep I grabbed it with both hands. After months of no sleep and fighting Ellie in the middle of the night to stop crying and begging her to sleep it really was our only option.
When Ellie turned one she suddenly started waking up again after 2 or 3 hours of being in her cot. She would still go to sleep okay, it was just if she woke in the night she wouldnt resettle unless she was in with us but as soon as she lay in our bed she was asleep again.
Lately sleep hasnt been great and im starting to feel drained due to that and working part time. Ellie now fights sleep and some nights it can be 9-10pm before she is settled in her cot. She has also been waking up crying throughout the night due to this sleep regression. Even when we are cosleeping she is suddenly waking around 4/5 times a night crying which isn’t like her.
I know that by 18 months she should be sleeping through in her own bed, she should be able to self settle and not scream for us when she does wake up. I also know that parenting after losing Jason has caused me to do lots of things that I wouldnt have necessarily done and because I am still convinced that like my time with Jason was limited; my time with Ellie is limited too and I will never let her just cry when time with her is so precious. I was advised by a HV that the only way she will learn to sleep through is to really try the “cry it out” method and not to go to her straight away when she calls for me in the night, for me this was never an option. For others they pushed through it and it worked but I wish there was advice for those of us who arent comfortable thinking I have abandoned the one thing I wanted and went through hell to cuddle and love.
Im hoping this regression doesnt do too much damage and that Ellie starts to sleep a bit earlier and spends more time in her own bed however as time doesnt stop I will enjoy the extra cuddles and the beautiful smile that wakes me up in a morning for as long as my baby needs. One day she wont want cuddles in the middle of the night and then I’ll know Ive done the best I can as her Mama ❤
Mothering A Rainbow 
Aww Ames, reading this I was thinking like others may have done “omg I don’t know how she copes with no sleep ” I couldn’t do it and then I was thinking maybe the crying it out method would work so do it but then I read more and thought do you know what if I had been through what you had been through I would do the exact same thing as you and I would cuddle her all day and all night. You keep doing what your doing and what makes you happy because you are a wonderful mummy to a very special little girl 💗 and like you said this won’t be forever xxx
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