Posted in parenting

Six weeks of HELL

The human body amazes me. It goes through so much in our lives and yet a slight change and everything goes tits up.

I haven’t felt like writing for the past six weeks, if i’m honest I haven’t felt like doing much for the past six weeks. I changed my contraception and honestly it was one of the worst decisions of my life.

You know the saying “I’m it aint broke, don’t fix it” well this wasn’t broke and I tried to fix it and failed.

I’ve felt so depressed and unlike myself and tried so hard to not let it affect my day-to-day life or how I parent Ellie. I didn’t want the downwards spiral to take control and knew I needed to accept that my mental health was actually fine but my medication wasn’t. I knew if I was going to stay on my current medication then I wouldn’t be able to be me and I hated the thought of losing myself. It’s taken me a while to figure out who I am and what my purpose in life is and now I’ve found it I am not giving it up.

I’m hoping to get my writing mojo back and hoping to get some time to let it all out. I find it difficult to sleep when I’m not blogging because I don’t have an outlet to empty my thoughts. So get ready to be bored to death (if anyone has stuck around long enough for me to get my shit together…again!) by my thoughts and opinions.


Wife & Mum of 2; Jason born and died 29/03/15 and Ellie born 01/11/16. Hoping to break the silence around baby loss and the journey of parenting a rainbow baby one blog post at a time.

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