Posted in parenting

Twenty Twenty

The year it all went wrong.

I think it’s pretty safe to say so far this year hasn’t been the best. In February we were dealt with storms that lasted days and caused flooding damage to so many areas around us. Thankfully, we are fortunate that we don’t live close to water and we didn’t suffer but lots of businesses and houses were destroyed due to flooding.

It feels like as soon as our county started getting back to normal we all went in to lockdown and that has been tough in itself!

As keyworkers my husband and I have both been working the odd day here and there but this has been a really difficult time. Ellie has been missing her friends, her nursery teachers, her grandparents and is so bored. It doesn’t matter what we do with her, to her she is still stuck at home and it’s really hard on her. It’s hard on all children.

Our days have been fairly relaxed, we’ve done some nursery homeschooling in the form of phonics, name writing and numbers. She’s read stories, retold stories and acted them out. She’s learnt how to put her socks on herself and has been helping do the odd chores around the house too.

We’ve also had more than one tantrum throughout, usually every couple of days we get a really bad day. It’s tough but just something we know we have to ride out as best we can.

I’ve tried to remain positive through all of this; we are safe at home and for as long as we can we will stay at home. I’ve lost one child, there is no way I am risking taking Ellie anywhere to lose another one. It saddens me that some people haven’t taken lockdown seriously enough; Ellie hasn’t seen ANYONE other than me and Luke in nearly 7 weeks and its tough yet we’ve seen neighbours still visiting their grandchildren regularly and having BBQ’s with their families. Trying to explain to a 3 year old why she can’t do the same (because to her everyone else is seeing their families and friends) is hard. We are both fortunate that our jobs are safe and we both have jobs to go back to, something I know others don’t have. Like I say, i’ve tried to remain positive and see the good in something that is so awful.

I’m hoping lockdown ends soon and we can start to begin a new normal way of living where we can start to venture out more and she is able to go to nursery but I can’t see that happening until September now. We shall see.

How has lockdown affected you?

Posted in motherhood, mothering a rainbow, Mum Blogger, mummy blog, parenting

Happy New Year

Is it just me or does anyone else feel like 2019 flew by? I don’t think I’ve had a single month where we haven’t been busy. I have neglected my little space on the internet and have felt quite lonely without it at times.

I have taken some time to really think about what I want from this space in the next 12 months and questioned whether I needed it any more. I do, but not in the same way as I did when I first started blogging. At the beginning blogging was a way for me to talk openly about Jason and my grief because I wasn’t able to do this in real life. I talked about him but only to a certain point that I knew friends and family could cope with. I couldn’t fully open up because honestly I knew the truth wouldn’t sit well with them.

I still love writing about him but once his story has been written and rewritten and written again there isn’t much else to say that hasn’t already been said. His story unfortunately doesn’t change, I can’t add anything new because he’s not here and that STILL hurts as much as the day I left him at the hospital. At the same time I enjoy writing about Ellie, her little quirks and personality is one of a kind. She brings a whole new meaning to fiery but she also brings more happiness than I ever thought possible.

So I decided I would make some goals to help me with this space and with the next 12 months. There is so much going on again this year and I am feeling excited to share the collaborations i’ve got lined up and more of our adventures as a family along the way!

So here are my 2020 goals:

  • To make time to write more (simply because this has been a difficult thing the last few months especially!)
  • To remember the happy times and not focus on the bad.
  • To engage more with other bloggers!

Here are my 2020 goals for my social media accounts:

  • To reach 10K followers on Instagram (I do follow genuine accounts back!)
  • To engage more with other bloggers, influencers and parents.
  • To develop my photography/editing skills
  • Don’t focus on ONLY posting the Instagram-worthy posts
  • BE REAL!

I’d love to hear your goals for 2020, write them in the comments and lets support each other. Trolls as SO 2019.