Posted in motherhood, mothering a rainbow, Mum Blogger, mummy blog, parenting, parenting after loss

Reality Vs Instagram


On Wednesday, I had a wonderful afternoon with Ellie. I’m doing some extra hours at work at the minute and it was lovely having time just the two of us. We went to our weekly Hartbeeps session and had lots of fun. Ellie was full of smiles (even though I woke her up) and loved singing the songs and dancing. It was Party week after all. I love our sessions because she becomes more confident with every week we go and Ellie loves our Hartbeeps leader too. Emma is amazing with her and Ellie feels comfortable around her. What a perfect way to spend our afternoon off together ❤ #perfect #mummydaughtertime



Of cause, life isn’t always Instagram friendly and there are certain things you don’t share on there to be seen to the world. Nobody wants reality on IG do they? Well in reality our Wednesday afternoon wasn’t quite as perfect as I wanted it to be, we really did have a lovely Hartbeeps session and I really did love spending that time with Ellie seeing as I have been doing extra afternoons.

After Hartbeeps I wanted to pop to the supermarket to grab Ellie some milk, we didn’t need much so I knew we wouldn’t be long. We went to B&M’s because Ellie was in such a good mood and was enjoying the walk around; she pushed the basket around happily and even helped put the few bits on to the conveyor belt to be paid for. Ellie then decided she wasn’t ready to leave the shop and threw herself to the floor in protest. I picked her up screaming and took her outside where lots of people starting looking over. When this girl wants to scream she does it VERY loudly. We didn’t make it to Sainsburys before I decided Ellie was not going to play ball and took her back to the car. Our afternoon just got worse from there, Ellie was NOT going to sit in her car seat, she decided to cry and scream and throw tantrum after tantrum for nearly 45 minutes. I was stook in Sainsbury’s car park with a Community Support Officer who appeared to be circling my car making sure I wasn’t trying to kill her. She just wouldn’t stop. I contemplated driving home with her sitting in the foot-well of the backseat (obviously I would NEVER do this but I thought about it!) I was tired, sweaty and really wanted to be at home where I wasn’t being stared at by people who obviously thought I was a terrible mother.

Life isn’t always perfect and children really do test your patience so much. I never imagined I would find parenting so difficult at times but the messages of support I received proved that we are not alone and despite the glaring stares, Ellie is not the first toddler to have such a public display of emotion in the way that she did and she probably won’t be the last. I’m 100% sure we’ll end up having more times like this. She is ginger haired and has a temper to match.

And I love her for her fiesty attitude and her wonderful personality.


Wife & Mum of 2; Jason born and died 29/03/15 and Ellie born 01/11/16. Hoping to break the silence around baby loss and the journey of parenting a rainbow baby one blog post at a time.

One thought on “Reality Vs Instagram

  1. Sending huge hugs. I’m not at the protest stage, but I know the feeling of the stares and it’s horrible. I’ve even had people come up to me and comment about my baby crying! People seem to forget that it’s normal for children to cry and they’re just learning. Hang in there your doing a great job x

    Liked by 1 person

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